As hard and personally “this interruption” affects me and my daughters, I came to learn much later that it has followed the steps which are common to the history of non-custodial fathers with their alienated children. In July 2 1999, my ex-wife and I separated. She had prepared an informal document defining my visitations with the girls that we both signed. I would see Camille and Chloé on Friday afternoon after school and on Sunday all day long until 5:00 pm.
At the beginning, I dreaded the consequences of the separation on my relationship with Camille and Chloé, then 4 and half and two. I was scared to lose the closeness of our relation altogether. I had to find an apartment quickly, very close to the West Side where they were living. I wanted this apartment to be close to parks, to have one independent bedroom for my girls where they could sleep and play. I found it in West Harlem. I first feared that they would be repelled by my place, which was naked, had none of the furniture, toys and comfort that my girls were used to. The first days, there was just a bed, not even a table where we could eat lunch. The first visit, we improvised a “dînette” – a kind of “déjeuner” on a piece of cloth- in the room where the girls would later be sleeping. This déjeuner went so well that I overcame all my fears. My girls did not give a first or a second thought to the not so fresh paintwork or the comfort in my apartment. They really were here to see me. Later on, our “dînettes” were populated with the folks – bears, dolls- that were added to us.
Read more at: http://fearlessfathers.wordpress.com/dad-interrupted/
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